2008 Woodie Awards
Can You Hear Me Now?
Emily Kahm
Issue date: 9/26/06 Section: News
- Page 1 of 1
They are our constant companions. They connect us to those we love. They entertain us. They serve as our alarm clocks, our watches, our computer away from our computers, our really expensive way to pass notes in class. We buy them more bling than Snoop-Dog, get them their own little leather sleeping bags, and attach clips so we can take them wherever we go. We teach them new songs. We just can't spend enough money on them. We repeatedly drop them on hard surfaces. And still they serve us.
"They" are our beloved cell phones, more loyal than Lassie and more useful than duct tape. We shell out cash by the fistful to have the newest, most miniscule phones possible, and buy the highest limit plans we can find. It seems a shame that they so rarely work in Rockhurst's dorms.
Oddly enough, dorms are the only major service-blocker on campus. Anyone who has sat through classes in Sedgwick with a soft spoken professor will tell you that not only do their cells receive calls, they are so energized with the dark powers of Sedgwick's ghosts that they take themselves off silent mode and ring louder than previously thought possible. So why the hang-up (no pun intended) in our places of residence?
McGee's elevators and basement put most phones into negative bars, and the past solution has been to have all the loudest females in the building migrate to the quiet floor to have their conversations. The same is true for all of Xavier-Loyola Hall. Sophomore Christine Gabelhause says, "I have to stand on my windowsill if I want to talk in my room. Otherwise, I have to go outside." There are rumors that the lack of cell phone service actually started the tradition of chain smoking on the steps of XL, as students desperately try to seek relief from their cell woes.
And yet there is hope for Rockhurst students to remain connected to the outside world, two solutions that don't involve strapping on a bullet-proof vest and venturing out on Troost. Those solutions are…T-Mobile and Cingular. They are the only providers of reliable service on campus-T-Mobile will actually counteract the dark powers of the poltergeist of the McGee elevators. Tests are still in progress to find out if Cingular also has the power of God on its side, but the proof is there-5 bars, anywhere on campus or in the Kansas City area, all the time, from both providers.
So there's your solution, Rockhurst students. Switch services. It isn't cheap, or fun, but hey, neither was getting your parents to pay your cell phone bills.
"They" are our beloved cell phones, more loyal than Lassie and more useful than duct tape. We shell out cash by the fistful to have the newest, most miniscule phones possible, and buy the highest limit plans we can find. It seems a shame that they so rarely work in Rockhurst's dorms.
Oddly enough, dorms are the only major service-blocker on campus. Anyone who has sat through classes in Sedgwick with a soft spoken professor will tell you that not only do their cells receive calls, they are so energized with the dark powers of Sedgwick's ghosts that they take themselves off silent mode and ring louder than previously thought possible. So why the hang-up (no pun intended) in our places of residence?
McGee's elevators and basement put most phones into negative bars, and the past solution has been to have all the loudest females in the building migrate to the quiet floor to have their conversations. The same is true for all of Xavier-Loyola Hall. Sophomore Christine Gabelhause says, "I have to stand on my windowsill if I want to talk in my room. Otherwise, I have to go outside." There are rumors that the lack of cell phone service actually started the tradition of chain smoking on the steps of XL, as students desperately try to seek relief from their cell woes.
And yet there is hope for Rockhurst students to remain connected to the outside world, two solutions that don't involve strapping on a bullet-proof vest and venturing out on Troost. Those solutions are…T-Mobile and Cingular. They are the only providers of reliable service on campus-T-Mobile will actually counteract the dark powers of the poltergeist of the McGee elevators. Tests are still in progress to find out if Cingular also has the power of God on its side, but the proof is there-5 bars, anywhere on campus or in the Kansas City area, all the time, from both providers.
So there's your solution, Rockhurst students. Switch services. It isn't cheap, or fun, but hey, neither was getting your parents to pay your cell phone bills.
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